No matter how carefully I plan and design my weddings and events, something always goes wrong. It’s inevitable. However, some things are very much IN your control. Here’s my list of the 10 things that can and should be perfect at every wedding and event:
1. Wedding and Event Invitations. On this, I am old school! Never, and I mean never, send invitations by email. Take the time and spend the money to carefully select and send paper invitations. Yes, I know, this is not good for the environment. However, when I get a great invitation in the mail, I keep it to remind me of that special occasion. Remember, too, that the invitation is the event’s first impression. It sets the tone for everything else that follows. It’s important.
2. Wedding and Event Installation. When it comes time to install an event, make sure you leave yourself plenty of time to finish the installation. You should be done at least an hour before guests begin to arrive. Keep in mind that a few guests always arrive early. You do not want to be caught rushing around and cleaning up when they walk through the door. You should be out of sight and out of mind by then!
3. Wedding and Event Ceremony. In some cultures, it’s fashionable to start weddings late. However, I strongly suggest that you never start the wedding ceremony more than 15 minutes late. It’s very rude to list one time on your invitation, and then keep those guests, who have arrived promptly, waiting.
4. Wedding and Event Flowers. A flower is at its most beautiful when it’s fully open. Make sure your flowers open fully on the day of your wedding or event. You want to catch them at their best. It took me years to learn this trick. Nurturing your flowers to open perfectly when you want them to, takes time and lots of care. But it’s possible, I swear, and it will make your wedding and event centerpieces and arrangements all the more stunning.
5. Wedding and Event Flowers. Again. What can I say? You know I love them! Never, ever use flowers that are beginning to wilt or turn brown. While it’s true that most flowers are a lot hardier than clients think, always have a few additional fresh flowers ready. Right before the event, examine every single centerpiece and arrangement for wilting flowers and replace any that look questionable. Hydrangeas, lilacs and gardenias are especially delicate and often don’t last as long as other flowers.
6. Wedding and Event Food and Catering. Obviously, you want to make sure that every course is presented in a smooth and timely fashion. Additionally, don’t serve plated food before guests have sat down. When guests arrive at their table and find their food already there, it begs the question of how long it has been there and how fresh it is. Presenting food to guests once they are seated is much more elegant. If you’re planning a buffet, do whatever you can to prevent long lines. Hungry guests holding bare plates and waiting in a long line is a big no no. It leaves a bad taste in my mouth just thinking about it!
7. Wedding and Event Music. Even if you have the best band and DJ in the world, you still have to manage your music, so that people can continue to socialize and hear themselves speak. Time the volume of your music. I’ve seen more than a few guests leave early, because the music was too loud. Don’t drive your guests away!
8. Wedding and Event Lighting. Please remember that the event is not the super bowl. Make sure your lighting is controlled and appropriate to an intimate and inviting environment. Two additional cautions:
a. If you add spotlights to show off your centerpieces, make sure it’s not directly in guests eyes.
b. If you plan to use lots of candles, be careful. Candles can create an inferno. Heat is no joke.
9. Wedding and Event Timing. Every successful wedding and event should be very carefully timed. From the first dance to the food service to the cake cutting, etc… Everything should be accounted for. Be prepared, however, for last minute changes. Part of your job is learning how to go with the flow, and STILL make it all work.
10. This is the most important thing to remember for a successful wedding or event: Stay close to your clients. Check in regularly, and make sure they’re happy and having a good time. This can be tricky. Most of my clients love and enjoy every minute of their wedding or event. However, some clients get so nervous and uptight that they forget to enjoy their own party. It’s your job to reassure them and remind them to have a good time.
The beauty of any wedding or event is that it happens only once. It’s not a dress rehearsal. I honestly don’t think there is such a thing as the perfect event. I completely agree with Jean Neuhart, of Weddings From The Heart, who commented on my blog yesterday. She said, “There’s no perfection in real life. All we can strive for is the best that is humanly possible.”
Questions for you: What’s your best advice for creating a memorable wedding or event? Is there one thing that really drives you crazy when it goes wrong? What is it, and how do you ensure it goes smoothly?
Please share your thoughts in the comments!
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George Bernard Shaw once said: “You see things and say, ‘Why?’ But I dream things that never were and say, ‘Why not?’” That quote embodies how Preston Bailey approaches every event.
Angela
May 3, 2011
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PRESTON!!!!!!!!
joana tomova
May 3, 2011
Great post as always. What drives me crazy? Rain… all my brides are very sad when it happens to rain on heir wedding /on my wedding it was raining too
/. Even if you did the perfect organization, the perfect food, the most gorgeous arrangements and the most beautiful flowers if it’s raining the event is never perfect.
Jennifer Bergman Weddings
May 3, 2011
Great tips. I like #10 the best – it’s so important to remind clients to relax and enjoy their day and let go of any trepidations they may have. I also like to remind the bride and groom to stay together throughout the evening as much as possible. They will have fonder memories of the day if they enjoy the experience as a couple!
Kristen, Parties by Kristen
May 3, 2011
Great post and Happy Birthday! In my opinion, flowers are the ultimate must have. I used a little formula I use to keep flowers fresh that I learned from the float decorators in the Tournament of Roses Parade: a mixture of 7UP and water. It keep them fresh through the stress of the parade as well as during the following days where the floats are on display to the public.
jacin {lovely little details}
May 3, 2011
this is such a helpful post. just curious, how often do you check in with the bride and groom during the event?
LISA
May 4, 2011
Preston, I would LOVE to know how you properly time out your florals and tips for best prepping of the blooms. Your flowers are always in their prime when photographed and showcased at your events and I would appreciate any additional knowledge that you care to share.
Thank you for creating such an amazing blog and website! It’s a daily read!
Betsy Romero (Happy Madison Events)
May 4, 2011
First of all: Happy Birthday Mr. Bailey !! I´m from Panama too and I want you to know that definately you are my role model to follow, I´m always reading your posts, it really help and encourage pleople like me, that are doing the first steps in this bussiness; thank you very much for sharing all your experience with us !!
About you question, the one thing that really dislike me is treating with people (must of the time family of the clients) that want to intervene in the process…
Regards from Panama !!!
tengku auvaroza
May 4, 2011
Happy Birthday Mr Preston Bailey. Great Tips. Thank you. I stil have problem with Hydrangeas . I live in Malaysia. I cant seem to find the formula to ensure the hydrangea to stay fresh slightly more than 24hours in a design using foam so now either I used the tubes or just as loose arrangements .
Occasions 2 Remember
May 4, 2011
Great information as always! Thanks and have a Happy Birthday!
Jason Hatch
May 4, 2011
#7 What can I say but Hire a FT Professional DJ (or Master of Ceremonies) who uses the right kind of sound system for the room, the number of guests in attendance and then
ATTENTION PLANNERS!!!! – ATTENTION DESIGNERS!!!!
You need to COORDINATE WITH THE ENTERTAINMENT providers early and often!
I cannot tell you how many times I have arrived on-site to a job to find there simply is nowhere but the worst place possible to set-up speakers making volume regulation a near impossible job.
Bring me in early and let me know what’s going on. Ask me what I’m bringing per the clients requests and my professional opinion and let’s work together to integrate what I must bring into the design so that we can..
A. Place it efficiently in the room- this allows for adequate sound dispersion without simply increasing the volume(The sure sign of a rookie DJ or sound tech!). Efficient speaker placement using high quality equipment delivers a much nicer experience that truly any professional DJ can provide with some collaborative planning!
B. Place it discreetly in the room! – Most professional quality sound gear isn’t really…well…let’s just say it isn’t Wedding aesthetic …if we work things out early in the process (what, where, when, how and why) Your design can shine and my stuff can do it’s job without detracting from your vision! I often challenge my clients to find my equipment in their wedding photos whenever I work with the elite photographers and designers I am lucky enough to see frequently. Because we stay in touch and we are having meetings in the initial planning stages and then throughout we, as professionals who respect one another, ensure that things won’t end up being seen that ought better just be heard!
Happy Birthday Preston! Another thought provoking and valuable post! Cheers!
Keeping Me Sane
May 4, 2011
Preston – I absolutely LOVE your blog. It has become my wedding planner’s bible (you should write a book for planners with that title…..credit to me of course
. You are such a huge source of support and reassurance. My team and I always strive for the perfect event but after 20 years in the event business, we are well aware that there is no such “exactly perfect” event. I am always able to make notes of what should be done differently or notes to make for next time. The list you have as the “must haves” for all events, is 200% correct.
The one thing that drives me crazy is when I plan the details, complete with full instructions for each vendor, including the venue, and then they “forget” their parts or when the venue forgets what time the wedding is suppose to be over and tries to end it early, when the bride/groom paid for additional time. I’ve had this happen twice in the last year..and it just wears me out.
But then I come home, read your blog and all is right with the world again. Thanks for always, always, keeping us sane!
And Happy Birthday. I hope it was as special as you are.
Angela Howard
May 4, 2011
Happy Birthday Preston!
YOUR NAME
May 4, 2011
happy Birth Day Preston
Live Longer to Decorate the world
crismarcuyares
May 4, 2011
Hello Preston, I have a dilemma and would like to help me. When it comes to organizing a wedding I understand that the Wedding Planner should stay to coordinate the event, but when you are an event decorator Is it necessary for the decorator is left at the party, is this correct?
John B
May 5, 2011
First, in regards to the post from TENGKU AUVAROZA …process your hydrangea into warm water.It will allow each bloom to soak up as much water as it can hold and give them the highest potential in your designs – foam or otherwise.
To you Preston – first Happy Birthday! Second … to answer your question …. one of my biggest pet peeves to an event or wedding going not as planned is a miscommunication between vendors and venues. When it is so crucially important for everyone to be on the same page for a single happening, vendors MUST communicate with each other! If your tables and linens (for example) aren’t placed when you arrive with your centerpieces, – where are you to go for answers if you don’t know who was providing thee items? The dominos can still fall quickly … even when they aren’t set off properly!
Savannah (Pearls and Pages)
May 10, 2011
Beautiful and helpful advice, Preston. As always
And agreed, with Jean Neuhart– perfection just doesn’t exist, but I think if we strive for it and have it in mind as a goal to reach (to be as close to perfect as possible), then naturally we’ll do our best.
Keep up your great work!
Cheers,
Savannah
The French Bouquet: Wedding & Event Florals
Fida Viantymala Sakdin
July 31, 2011
Thank you sir! This will be a help! Appreciate it!
Edgar Allen
January 11, 2012
Great content, love your blog, keep posting !!
Thanks
Edgar Allen
The Wedding Project NYC
Austin Florist
May 14, 2012
I liked #9 the most. Timing is the most important thing. Don’t disturb the flow~